Monday, December 24, 2007

Top Five Metal Christmas Tunes

Christmas and heavy metal have always shared a bittersweet relationship. After all, should musicians whose sheer existence depends on the denigration of religion cop to being family folks off hours? So many have said over the years that they don't really believe their lyrics' words—that they're merely actors portraying characters (looking at you, Alice Cooper)—yet they won't lighten up their tunes. Anyway, a few artists have written Christmas songs (and anti-Christmas songs, but really what are we to believe?), and shockingly they're pretty good. So, without further ado…

  1. King Diamond – "No Presents for Christmas"

    The mother of all antichristian flagellation. But at the end he says he'd dreaming of a "white Sabbath." Isn't that self-contradictory?

  1. Fight – "Christmas Ride"

    Naturally, Judas Priest singer Rob Halford can write a great song about anything. Plus, I believe he really wishes he could go on a Christmas ride.

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  1. Spinal Tap – "Christmas With the Devil"

    Who cares about sincerity? This song rocks. Plus, if they were serious about it, it would be better than King Diamond's Christmas song.

  1. Bob Rivers – "I Am Santa Claus"

    "Leave him cookies and beer/He'll be back to your house first next year." Neither Ozzy nor Kris Kringle himself couldn't have said better.

  1. Twisted Sister – "Oh Come All Ye Faithful"

    Who cares about sincerity? Dee Snider! Now this is a present I can get behind.

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